


If I asked you

by starkaryen



Series: By the mountain [2]
Category: Hannibal (TV)
Genre: #ItsStillBeautiful Fest, Kissing, M/M, Naked Cuddling, Post-Episode: s03e13 The Wrath of the Lamb, Talking, a lot of it, or almost naked
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-26
Updated: 2017-08-26
Packaged: 2018-12-20 04:50:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11913573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starkaryen/pseuds/starkaryen
Summary: Will and Hannibal have a conversation the following morning.





	If I asked you

**Author's Note:**

> So, remember [this little fic](http://archiveofourown.org/works/9813428)? I said I might turn it into a series because I wanted to continue it, and writing small one-shots sometimes helps me (especially now with the writer's block). And so, here it is.
> 
> It can be read without reading the first, but I also reference it and continue it.
> 
> Also, I meant this to be a PWP with a bit of plot as the other one was, but Hannibal and Will do not. Shut. Up. So... I had to end this in this point. I hope it's not too bad ^^
> 
> Thanks to @Llewcie for the beta <3333
> 
> Gorgeous edit by @levi163 [here](http://starkaryen.tumblr.com/post/164642801823/if-i-asked-you-second-part-of-by-the-mountain).

When Will woke up, he was alone in bed. He spread his hand across the mattress, and he noticed that Hannibal couldn’t have gone that long ago; the sheets were still warm.

He got up, put on a pair of pajama pants and a white t-shirt, and walked out. As he went downstairs, he heard the wind blowing outside, making the trees from the back of the house creak, and whistling against the wooden walls. When he looked out the window on the landing, he saw that it wasn’t snowing yet, but it looked like it would later. Despite that, the inside of the house was perfectly warm.

Once in the lower floor of the house, Will peeked inside the room Hannibal had chosen upon arriving to the house a few months back; the bed was perfectly made and empty, as expected, so he continued down the hall. When he didn’t find the other man in the study or the living room either, he went straight to the kitchen. And there, he found Hannibal; he was standing with his back to the door, looking through the window, a mug of steaming coffee on his hand and resting on the counter, and dressed with his own pajama pants and a blue sweater. Despite his acute senses, he didn’t seem to have heard him, probably lost in thought, so Will stayed a moment at the doorframe, observing him in silence. Still, it didn’t take much for Hannibal to raise his head slightly, and Will wondered what had given him away; his scent? The sound of his breathing?

“Good morning,” he said turning around, and Will’s eyes went to Hannibal’s own as he smiled a little.

Will walked around the wooden table in the center of the kitchen and took a mug to pour himself a coffee from the pot Hannibal had made. Once he had taken the first sip, he turned to Hannibal, who was now leaning against the counter, staring at him with a smile of his own.

“Morning,” Will finally said with a little nod.

In the light of the day, Will recalled the night before. Everything they had done, all the hushed words exchanged… Will was dying to lean closer to Hannibal and kiss him, touch him, feel him as he had felt him last night… But he was still unsure of how _this_ was going to play out, so he chose to take another sip of his coffee instead.

“I was… considering whether I should go out to buy some vegetables,” Hannibal said finally, probably to break the silence. They had never needed to fill the silences between them, but yet again, things were changing around them.

“In this weather…?” Will asked.

The small group of villages they were installed close to seemed to work even during the hardest days of the winter like this one was threatening to be. But even so, Will would not venture out today, of all days.

“We are out of many things, but I supposed it could wait until tomorrow. Maybe the storm will calm by then.”

“Yeah, that would be best. I’ll go with you, even. You keep talking about the old lady who owns the orchard, I should go meet her at some point.”

“It’s a date,” Hannibal said, and Will looked at him above the rim of his mug. The smile on his lips told Will the choice of words hadn’t been coincidental.

Hannibal made him breakfast with the eggs he had also bought from the orchard lady and the bread they had in the freezer for an eventuality like this. After breakfast, Hannibal usually went on his errands if he hadn’t already before Will woke up, or they both went for a little walk around the house. Their wounds had been healing slowly, and now that they were almost completely recovered, they didn’t want to overexert themselves.

This morning, though, with the wind roaring outside and the air electrified between them, they went to the studio. It was a room with a large window from which they could see a couple of the multiple small towns down the mountain - not today, though, since the clouds had descended and were covering everything around them; all they could see were the trees around the house.

In front of the window and slightly aimed so they were almost facing each other, there were two armchairs; it was one of the few things Hannibal had bought when they had moved to the house, and it hadn’t escaped Will how similar they were to the ones that had been in Hannibal’s old office.

Will hadn’t asked about the house, either. He hadn’t asked if Hannibal had owned this house for a long time, or why was it completely furnished, even if the style had nothing to do with Hannibal’s house in Baltimore. The only thing he cared about was that it was far, far away from everything they had left behind.

They sat on the armchairs, and for a while, neither of them spoke. Will observed as the wind shook the trees, making them dance in sync.

“Can we be honest with each other?” Will asked then, and out of the corner of his eye he saw Hannibal turning slightly to him.

“Please,” Hannibal agreed, interlacing his hands on his lap.

“These past months, they’ve been… calm. Quiet. It has been only us, but maybe it won’t always be that way.”

“We have no way to know it, except to keep going and figure things out on the way,” Hannibal said in a calm voice, but Will had learned to identify the slight strain in it that meant Hannibal was distressed by Will’s words and where this conversation could go.

“I know,” Will said, and he finally turned to meet Hannibal’s gaze. “Last night, I told you, I… didn’t want any games between us, not about this. I meant it.”

“And I meant it, too, when I said there have never been, not on my part, not about… _this_.”

Will fell silent then; that, at least, he couldn’t deny.

“When did you… Did you ever- I don’t know. Imagined I could feel… the same?”

Hannibal inhaled through his nose and cocked his head. “I never dared to presume.”

“Why didn’t you ask, then?” Will asked.

This was something he had been wondering the past months. While the two men had danced around each other, avoiding what they really wanted to talk about, Will had been thinking, thinking… And now, he finally could speak all of it.

“Too much to lose, I guess. I valued your friendship and company more than I valued my own desires. And when I was _really_ aware of my own feelings for you, it was never the right time.”

Will chuckled. “You didn’t handle friendship very well at first, so maybe it’s better you didn’t tell me about your _desires_ from the beginning.”

Will looked at Hannibal, but he wasn’t smiling with him. He had averted his eyes, but didn’t seem hurt because of Will’s half joke; he seemed to be focused on something.

“What is it?” Will asked after a moment, and Hannibal seemed to return to the present.

“So much has changed since then… Even if I thought I had too much to lose, or if it wasn’t the right time, I… was never afraid of the prospect of confessing my feelings, or speaking to you about it.”

“You mean that you’re afraid _now_? Of this talk?”

“Not the talk itself. Of what the future will bring now.”

“I thought you lived more in the now… and that you weren’t afraid to anything,” Will pointed out.

Hannibal looked away again, this time through the window. Will waited as he seemed to arrange his thoughts, and then he sighed and started speaking.

“After losing my family as a boy… with time, I stopped being afraid. I had no reason to be, about anything, since the only people I truly cared about no longer existed. I very much enjoyed being alive, but I didn’t fear death. And after killing or locking up the people who did that to my family, there was nothing else to fear.”

“What has changed, then?” he asked, despite knowing very well the answer.

“You.”

Hannibal turned to look at him as he said it, and Will tilted his head upwards.

“What are you scared of? Of me dying, after trying to kill me yourself?”

Hannibal didn’t seem affected by the accusation, and there was no resentment in Will’s tone. Not after everything, not when they had hurt each other in the past, and yet now they were both here, together.

“Yes. I’m scared of you leaving. I’m scared of you dying. I’m scared of the prospect of a life without you.”

Will felt his heart skipping a beat. Despite knowing this already, hearing it was very different. Hearing it made it all too real.

“What if… I asked you to let me go?” Will asked, and he saw the quick change in Hannibal’s features, along with his slight intake of air, reflecting the pain he was trying to conceal. “Would you?”

“I don’t know… Perhaps. And perhaps I would go find you right after you walked through the door.”

Will nodded, and then he smiled a little, which made Hannibal frown.

“Hannibal… do you know why I threw us both off the cliff?” Will asked, and Hannibal tilted his head, probably caught off guard; Will himself hadn’t planned on saying that.

“I believe I do…”

“I don’t mean the _why_ I did it. But why I pushed the _both_ of us, instead of just pushing you. You seriously hadn’t considered it?”

“I guess I haven’t.”

“I could’ve pushed you, and _you_ alone. We were both heavily injured, and after that moment, it would’ve been so easy… But I didn’t. It didn’t even cross my mind.”

Will paused then, and Hannibal stayed silent, probably replaying in his mind the minutes after they had killed the dragon, every second and every detail of it… exactly as Will was doing in this moment before he continued speaking.

“Remember when I asked you if we could survive separation…?” he asked, and he could’ve sworn Hannibal was holding his breath in that moment. “Do you still not realize that was my answer? We can’t promise that we won’t try to hurt each other ever again, but… I can’t live without you, and I _won’t_ live without you.”

Hannibal’s eyes changed again, lighting up. Will recognized that look all too well, because he had seen it too many times to count. He had only learned and accepted what that look meant not long ago, but now that he did, he felt a warm feeling in his belly only at the very sight.

Will’s smile grew wider, so he ran a finger across his lower lip to try to get a hold of himself. But then, he thought, _why_ did he have to hide it? Why did he have to pretend like he wasn’t _very_ pleased to see that expression in Hannibal’s face, like he himself wasn’t feeling something akin to happiness…? He decided that he didn’t have to, so he looked at Hannibal again and sighed.

“What if… I asked you to kiss me?”

Will waited for a witty remark on Hannibal’s part. Instead, he uncrossed his legs and got up from his seat. Their armchairs were separated by merely two steps, and yet, when Hannibal turned and walked to him, Will felt every step as if it were a week long, the sound reverberating inside him as if he was hollow and the only thing filling him were Hannibal’s steps approaching him. As Hannibal got closer, Will leaned backwards, sinking into the back of the armchair. When Hannibal’s legs were finally almost touching Will’s, he spread his thighs as a reflex. And then, Hannibal dropped to his knees.

Will’s breath hitched in his throat as he tightened his hold on the arms of the chair. Hannibal merely looked up at him and stayed still, waiting, letting Will be the one to make the next move. Will felt again the heady feeling of knowing how much power he had over Hannibal. How much power they had over each other…

Very slowly, Will straightened in the chair, leaning forwards. His hands went to Hannibal’s clothed chest, where he first skimmed over the cloth with his fingertips until he finally touched him in earnest, at which Hannibal’s breath became uneven. He gently dragged his hands across Hannibal’s chest up to his shoulders, where he settled them with a light squeeze through the sweater.

Only then, did Will look up to Hannibal’s face. His lips were parted to accommodate his breathing, his eyes slightly closed as he stared at Will… And so, Will closed his own eyes and leaned forwards as he dragged his hands up and to the back of Hannibal’s neck. He first found Hannibal’s forehead with his own, and he allowed himself to rest there for a moment, to really take in how intimate, how close they were in this moment. The previous night they had shared much more than this, they had been much, _much_ more intimate, and yet it had been born out of urgency, out of not being able to live another second without touching and being touched. But now, it felt like they had all the time in the world. It felt like they could live in this moment for all eternity, and Will would be very fine with that. So Will dragged his fingertips along Hannibal’s nape, he nuzzled Hannibal’s nose, and felt their breath mingling between their mouths. And finally, he leaned into Hannibal’s lips.

The first kiss was only a delicate brush, and Will smiled as he tipped his head further. The following kiss was much deeper, Will sucking on Hannibal’s lower lip as he gently gripped Hannibal’s hair on the back of his head. Will quickened the kiss but only slightly, parting Hannibal’s lips with his own, and when he felt their tongues touching, he heard himself moaning softly.

When they moved back, Will looked at Hannibal as he caught his breath, and he smiled at the image of seeing Hannibal’s undone and soft expression with only a kiss.

“What if… I asked you to go back to bed?” he asked him in a whisper.

Hannibal smiled a little, and licked his own lips leisurely before answering.

“I believe, dear Will… that the answer to all these questions is the one I just gave you.”

They left the studio with unhurried steps, Will going first and Hannibal following closely. As they walked upstairs, Will saw that it was already snowing outside, as he had predicted, the thick snowflakes being swayed by the wind.

When they came to the room, Will didn’t’ hesitate before taking his shirt off with a single pull, and then let his pajama pants fall on the floor, toeing them away. Hannibal was standing still behind him, once again letting Will make the next movement. And so he did.

Will approached Hannibal and took the hem of his sweater. He looked up at him to see if something had changed in him, and indeed something had; there was a small smile on Hannibal’s lips that Will mimicked unconsciously. He took the garment off, and then untied Hannibal’s pajama pants, letting them fall exactly as he had done with his own.

Will let himself really look at Hannibal’s almost naked form, since the night before everything had happened too quickly to really revel in the sight. Will’s gaze roamed across Hannibal’s chest, where the hair was greying, and down to his stomach. He put his hand there as he circled Hannibal, dragging his hand across his belly, his arm and finally his back. His eyes went to his nape and fell down the gorge between his shoulder blades and into the valley of the small of his back, where the ugly, crooked Verger mark rested. He had seen it a few times before, since seeing each other undressed had been something unavoidable when they started healing from the battle with the dragon and the plunge to the sea. But still, as he brushed it with a hand, he felt the anger twisting his stomach for a moment at remembering Mason. He was glad he was long dead, and he knew that his death had belonged to Margot, but Will couldn’t help but feel the tip of his fingertips tingling at the missed opportunity of doing so himself, or with Hannibal. He forced himself to tear his gaze away from it and to circle Hannibal again.

Will offered him his hand, which Hannibal took immediately, and Will led him to the bed, where he climbed on the mattress. Will had to let go of Hannibal to lay down on his left side, and Hannibal did the same, except lying on his back, since the wound still bothered him in certain positions. Once they were both settled, Will moved closer to him until his chest was against Hannibal’s shoulder, and draped his arm over Hannibal’s belly. The warmth and feeling of both of their bodies together brought him an immediate feeling comfort and peacefulness that overwhelmed Will completely. Will felt his eyes tearing up, and so he closed them and nuzzled against Hannibal’s shoulder. Hannibal smelled like soap and like _himself_ , and Will let out half a sob, half a chuckle, since the feeling was too strong.

Will felt then Hannibal’s hand on his cheek, caressing him, and he opened his eyes. Hannibal’s eyes were also watery, and so Will chuckled in earnest as he craned his neck and kissed him once on the lips.

Hannibal rolled over still in Will’s arms, making it easier for Will to embrace him and hold him against his chest, and Will interlaced their fingers together.

They dozed like that all morning, neither of them wanting to leave the refuge of the room.

**Author's Note:**

> \----
> 
> All information + links about my writing are [here](https://about.me/mizumohno).
> 
> Say hello to me @ [twitter](https://twitter.com/mizumohno) and [tumblr](http://starkaryen.tumblr.com/) :)


End file.
